Dear God

by Khanum

I write to you again ,  on this auspicious day to mention what things worry me in life which was given by You.

Life’s a beauty and a bounty, My Master. I am not denying that. But sometimes it grows  quite heavy on your servants.  We begin to feel tired and alone. I cannot deny this either…

Our hearts begin to carry  a crucial worry that never lets us rest. A worry that sleeps when we’re asleep and awakens as we rise. It stops when we  think of You and deepens when we  see someone happy and we let the Satan whisper in our ears. He whispers, ‘Don’t pray and don’t Trust He will show you an escape, You will never have that happiness’ , so we stop believing.

I have such a worry too , Dear God!  I am in trouble and I am in this trouble ,  Alone!

One minute the world is okay – the next it’s again void , empty and hollow.

I may very well let this routine continue, let this time pass out and let this worry wrinkle me and take me away from you … but suddenly – You – make it easy for me to see what You have been wanting me to do..You save me.

I realize something and Oh! the beauty of it Allah! I suddenly rejoice and cry words of  thanks, words of  forgiveness.

Even though I know I have wrecked things in life … The Beauty of Your love in my heart says , You will still make it better.

I joyously make wudu, I humbly establish salaat and then miraculously , just like out of the blue,  You appear in my heart. You truly, truly appear as peace in my heart. And In that brief moment, I am assured  its a proof  you wanted me to call out for You.

And I do call out for you.

Had there been no courage no support from you to pray , how would the world had survived after all Allah ? I cannot imagine that.

And because I cannot imagine You as anything else but Mercy and Sustainer of the worlds – who can do EVERYTHING – I will write to you again and again . Because now I know, Dua and Qadr (predestination) are both a part of Allah’s plan. And a gift when we’re lost.

Accept the prayers of this servant Ya Allah, and grant me , my parents, my future spouse, my loved ones and my descendants a pious life and make us your humble Obedient servants. Let the children of my children walk the straight path, serve your deen in every way possible and die on Deen ul Haq. Ya Allah Ya Rabul Alameen, You are the Most High and Most forgiving!  Forgive my sins, Allah, forgive my sins. Forgive my sins. Forgive my sins. And let me die with Your Praise on my tongue.

Yours forever,

Khanum…

“Do not despair of solace from Allah (swt). No one despairs of solace from Allah except for people who disbelieve.” [Surah Yusuf, 87]

P.S. You didn’t summon for me this year for Hajj, Allah?…  I truly wanted to be there but its alright, I’m hoping you would call me next year? I love you! Please do consider calling me there with my mehram ? Please? I’ll be ever thanful…..

10 Comments to “Dear God”

  1. Eid Mubarak. An interesting post!

  2. Uh nice post. and read the next part after like 8 hours… Eid Mubarak

  3. Ameeeeeeeeen to your duas.

    How was your Eid?

    • Alhamdulillah is an expected and proper reply but how can I ignore the fact that on this EID i felt, EID is no longer a fun thing :O…. Times changed man! bachpan ki eid miss ki bht ! yehi kia bs….

  4. u made me cry Khanum😥 n now i cant do anything else.. but …….

  5. Ameen to your dua! Loved the post! :’)

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