Posts tagged ‘happiness’

May 15, 2018

How does it feel like?

by Khanum

How does it feel like?

It feels like coming home.

How does it feel like?

It feels like anything I’ve never felt before..

How does it feel like?

It feels calm, light and familiar

How does it feel like?

It feels like tranquil and sober.

How does it feel like?

It feels like putting down my bags, smiling and looking at the walls of my own comfortable home

How does it feel like?

It feels like God really knows.

How does it feel like?

A long walk back to myself

How does it feel like?

It feels like I finally understand.

And the windows? The neighbours. Where are they, have they moved back or moved on?

How does it feel like?

It feels like, empty rooms next door

How does it feel like?

Like everyone is on a journey. But I’m back home.

How does it feel like?

It feels like going on a sweet bicycle ride, on my own

How does it feel like?

It feels like a happy rainy storm

How does it feel like?

It feels really light on my feet

How does it feel like?

 Like contentment seeping into me.

How does it feel like?

It feels like, looking at a familiar moon.

How does it feel like?

Like I’m me again,

yet renewed.



Dedicated to my old wordpress blog, and renewal of faith. When you are you again, and also new. That feeling, of having wings, and being at peace with your choices, to draw closer to simple things in life, and God. How does that feel like? … It feels like, coming home.

And the neighbors? Almost every other blog I used to know on word press, is either set to private, abandoned or refurnished and then abandoned. I guess they are still on their journey. How does that feel like? Perhaps, they too are looking for their homes. 

October 28, 2013

Wedding :) and my happy busy days last week.

by Khanum

Just a glimpse of wedding dress!

I wanted to add the Twitter live feed widget at the right corner of this blog last week so that while I stay busy in wedding , I could share my thoughts during the day and whenever I could manage. It would have been AWESOME like live news feed or broadcast. But Dang it -___- I didn’t get time to do it.

Anywho, I’m back after a week. The wedding was fab. I looked fab. My friends looked fab. Everything was fabbity fabbity fab.  🙂 Stay tuned to know more. Right now am extremely tired and extremely busy in life after returning back to normal routine chores. So see you all soon.



P.S. You may start congratulating the bride now. 🙂





September 15, 2013

Windy Happiness!

by Khanum

Today morning I woke up to find a stormy sky. It was 5pm in the evening. Morning for me but noon for normal people. I heard some murmurs around me, my mother speaking to someone, people talking pleasantly about the weather outside. Soon it turned to rain. And by the time I walked out of the room, looked at the sky , it was turning dark. Red dark and windy.


I did ablution for aser and offered my prayer. Things were somehow pleasant today for me. Missed a photowalk at a garden. Didn’t read newspaper. Those 4 of them are still resting comfortably before my eyes on the table. Didn’t check even a single news update at internet. I’m surely not going to check whole night either. Today was just me. Watched wall-E for the second time with mum. Watched Life of Pi for the first time and with it’s cinematography and imagination scale, i’m totally in love.


I pray and hope the sky rains the same way tomorrow as well, and the day after tomorrow and then the day after that. Winds and beautiful weather is all that I need for few days. 

It’s nice to live without any pressure on head for sometime. 



October 25, 2011

How to : How to Be !

by Khanum

I googled ‘Happiness’  in search of happiness. It gave a number of good ‘salt-on-wounds’ quotations. After 2 minutes scrolling,  I found a trail of it somehow which led me to another and How I landed cleaning up my own room is today’s story for the blog !

How to find happiness. How to find Peace. And How to find that balanced medium where you are neither  fooled by anyone nor wronged. Most of all, where you are at peace with your own-self  and treatment of your surroundings.

1st  Step : The best way to cheer yourself up is to try to cheer somebody else up. (Mark Twain)

It does not include , Crying , Wailing , Accusing , Creating a scene or worst of all Taking Revenge. Just hush up – Do sabr , and try to fight the sadness and evil bubbling inside your heart or gifted by others with good, good and nothing more than good.  However,The questions is, how you make others happy? Say Hello to:

2nd Step: 32 Ways To Make Someone Happy Today (by ZenHabits)

You pretty much forget your sorrows and  dedicate your life to social work. I like this idea. It keeps u busy all day that in the end you’re too tired to think about your problems. You ignore you pretend everything is okay.

About the tips by zen, I agree with most of the tips given here, BUt most of them are not applicable if your energy levels at heart are not upto it due to the sad context of your present state. For instance , the very first one.


My question is , How ?  Smiling is easy indeed but not when you’re feeling the opposite of it.  You can try faking it. And that’s not a smile. That’s ‘bullshitting’ oneself.

Now being a Muslim, it’ commonly known that we’re to recite alot of Quran and make dua and such. Personally , I do this too. Either worries of the study, friends issues or anything else, I start praying alot. Its like the prayer rug is your whole universe. You don’t want to get up from sitting in front of Allah and turn to the world which is nothing but remorse. This practice , alot of praying and putting your trust in Allah’s merciful Hands does miracles. You do actually feel better with the passage of time.

But they say, Being wronged is nothing unless you continue to remember it. So even though you may heal up for the time being. If you continue to remember the wrong u did to someone or the wrong someone did to you – you’re back to the beginning of pathetic topia.

The googling didn’t work out for me much. I had plans for some social work but by the time those plans are turned into actions, I may be dead or over it. Who knows?

I shut the laptop down and cast a look at my room. And I knew What I had to do. I decided to re-arrange my things – clean up every mess and have a new room to begin with !!! This sure brought my mother alot of happiness.

The point is , The problems will always be there in your life. What matters is how to respond. If they never gona leave your side, you might just as well be friends with them. They will break you from with in trust me on that – but Listen! What matters is your reply. Just tell them , ‘ HEy! You might break me but you can’t break my Trust in Allah!! Show me what you’ve got!! Bring it On!’

Now back to the room. There lay a brush somewhere in the drawer …the men use for shaving foam. I have no idea how it made its way to my room. I picked it up and began to dust my study table.

I wasn’t feeling good upto this time but atleast I was busy in something. I cleaned those corners of my room which I had never seen before.  Found things in the utterly attic like drawers which I had lost long long ago.

I moved the study table aside and crept in the back to seriously clean. A big giant spider stared at me.

‘WHat are you doing here, Khanum ?’ It asked.. It bloody asked.

‘Just trying to clean…my room.”

‘I bloody live here Khanum.  You just come and go..’ And it was right.

It was right.  It really was right. I suddenly realised, this room was just a room for me , but for this creature , it was his whole world. Could I crush it to find myself the satisfaction of having a cleaned room ?

I immediately let that spider go and his web. It still is staring me from the corner of my study table I’m sure. My room is still a mess.

I haven’t found that feeling which would set me free. But atleast I have made that spider happy.

I don’t know what I’ll do next to find happiness that wouldn’t ask for a sacrifice in return.

Perhaps , try jumping from some building. Just for the rush you know ! If I succeed, you might get good snapshots.