Posts tagged ‘writings’

June 7, 2018

Cafe De Pamir and what makes it special

by Khanum

بسم الله

Sleepy, sluggish, happy dreams. I woke up yawning from my deep slumber.  On my right was the new friend I had made on the trip, a girl from Abbotabbad. And on my left, was my mother. Curled up, and asleep like a baby. This was Hunza. I was at Cafe de Pamir. The morning was beautiful and unlike any other morning of my life, and despite my exhaustion, and fatigue screaming from every bone of my body including the muscles and the skin, I was too happy and euphoric for the morning. 

My first view of the day was probably the ceiling. The beautiful new ceiling. The ceiling? How silly it may sound and ordinary to mention, but when you are on vacation and in a different setting, the very minutest details become your  kham-khua ki khushi. The very new things, your reason for feeling blessed. And your senses, heightened enough to detect even the tiniest of the new flower outside your window, becoming your muse on the journey.

The fact that there could be bugs on the floor ( but there weren’t) where we had comfortably decided to sleep last night, did not bother me. There were bunker beds, four of them, but the main attraction of the room: the big windows, had us rolling with joy on the floor.

When I say rolling with joy, you have to picture euphoria. The euphoria upon getting a room with giant windows on two sides that open up to the mountain Rakaposhi on the right and, another giant mountain on the front. We definitely hadn’t seen it coming.

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May 15, 2018

How does it feel like?

by Khanum

How does it feel like?

It feels like coming home.

How does it feel like?

It feels like anything I’ve never felt before..

How does it feel like?

It feels calm, light and familiar

How does it feel like?

It feels like tranquil and sober.

How does it feel like?

It feels like putting down my bags, smiling and looking at the walls of my own comfortable home

How does it feel like?

It feels like God really knows.

How does it feel like?

A long walk back to myself

How does it feel like?

It feels like I finally understand.

And the windows? The neighbours. Where are they, have they moved back or moved on?

How does it feel like?

It feels like, empty rooms next door

How does it feel like?

Like everyone is on a journey. But I’m back home.

How does it feel like?

It feels like going on a sweet bicycle ride, on my own

How does it feel like?

It feels like a happy rainy storm

How does it feel like?

It feels really light on my feet

How does it feel like?

 Like contentment seeping into me.

How does it feel like?

It feels like, looking at a familiar moon.

How does it feel like?

Like I’m me again,

yet renewed.



Dedicated to my old wordpress blog, and renewal of faith. When you are you again, and also new. That feeling, of having wings, and being at peace with your choices, to draw closer to simple things in life, and God. How does that feel like? … It feels like, coming home.

And the neighbors? Almost every other blog I used to know on word press, is either set to private, abandoned or refurnished and then abandoned. I guess they are still on their journey. How does that feel like? Perhaps, they too are looking for their homes. 

May 14, 2018

Ahad Ahad …

by Khanum

Bismillah. It is 2:13 AM here, and what in the name of Allah am I doing here?

Well, I’m sitting on my bed, smiling to my adult self like a child, who is extremely and thoroughly pleased with herself for coming home. 🙂 Before me is my first baby blog, where I have moved back. Did I not tell you I am closing down the domain? What a relief it has been to come to this decision. Yes, yes,! I cannot explain the happiness and lightness I am feeling in my being for embracing my simple wordpress blog and leaving the giant domain that I had purchased for God knows what reasons. It will be gone by May next year as the package expires. And you know what? After going through such lovely old posts on my original blog, there’s something I would love to share, once again, to commemorate the essence of Khanumsays.

Ahad Ahad… Now posted for the second time. The only post, to be shared twice on Khanumsays.

Why shed these tears of sorrow?

Why shed these tears of grief? Ya nafsy how soon you forget, After trials come sweet relief

Why turn you from Ar-Rahman? Why yearn for a listening friend? Ya nafsy, do you not remember, On ALLAH (SWT), you must depend?

Have you not read those stories, Of the trials in days gone by, Of the Sahaba beloved by ALLAH (SWT), Who for ALLAH (SWT)’s cause did strive?

Why loosen your hold upon Him? Why fling away, His outstretched Hand? Ya nafsy, do you not remember, Bilal’s Sabr on the blazing sand? “

“Ahad! Ahad!” He cried, While his flesh did drip and burn. “Ahad! Ahad!” He cried, To ALLAH (SWT) alone he turned.

Have you forgotten the firmness of Hamza, As the gleaming swords did fall? With Sabr he turned to ALLAH (SWT), As the Quraish did slice and maul.

Why drown in salty tear drops? How can you dare compare your pain? To that of Yasir and Summayah, As they lay tortured on the scorching plain?

Have you forgotten the charring of Khabbab, As on burning coals he lay? Ya nafsy how meager your suffering, Wherefore do you lose your way?

Why befriend you not Al-Wali? Why not in Salaah to Him complain? Like Job who only to Allah, Turned in all his grief and pain?

Forget you that trials in this life, Cleanse your heart and make it clean? Ya nafsy, why all this sadness? Do you not wish your heart to gleam?

Be patient in all your hardships, ALLAH (SWT) hears your cries of woe. So trust Him and His Hikmah, For He knows best and not you.

So tighten your hold upon Him, Lest He withdraw His outstretched Hand! And remember the example of Bilal, As he lay anchored on the blazing sand.

“Ahad! Ahad!” he cried, While his flesh did drip and burn. “Ahad! Ahad!” he cried, To ALLAH (SWT) alone he turned.

Author unknown


December 3, 2013

Life Above zero !

by Khanum

I want to eat chubby babies!

And fried fish.

And now You are shocked to read my opening words.

No?  Okay. Never mind. At least you’re bit curious what’s this post about so keep reading.

Screenshot (4)

Yesterday , I got published by big Productive Muslim. It was a good news after a good wait. But what humbled me more and made me write this post is the overwhelming response of the readers. Shared above is the screenshot of my blogstats. WordPress counted the increasing number of my visitors, a sudden spike in stats right after the article got publsihed! and even though am not Zen Habits, No big blog on the bloc but hey! Khanum is not some tandoor wali. This blog means alot to me so by just reading  “Your blog stats are BLOOMING”  khanum also bloomed!

Such sweet and nice notifications by wordpress are very rare. At least for me. Its 2nd time I got to know my blog is blooming though, don’t remember what was the reason last time it happened. I wonder when the day would come or if it would ever come when wordpress finally says “YOU’RE FRESHLY PRESSED Pagli! Take this freshly pressed badge and do hip hip hurray!”

Anyway , What I do remember is, the response was almost the same when I got published at Productive Muslim for the first time ever, alot of people left their nice comments on my blog here after reading it, but woaw! It just got better this with huge traffic. A BIG thanks to Productive Muslim and all those readers out there who read me and most importantly care enough to leave a comment. It means alot. I’m constantly receiving hits on my site , comments on here from those who loved the piece , some subscribed to the blog while 1 or 2 I guess even followed me on twitter. I saw the facebook page, wow, so many people considered it worth sharing which means the more people read it, they are reminded of Allah and I get to earn sawab. I just wanted to say I am humbled. I do not deserve this much attention but yet I get it  so Alhamdulillah , it makes me really feel blessed.  May Allah love you all and bless so much.

Now! Towards the second part of the post >>>>>

Let me introduce to you a new blogger on the block! Behold the beautiful screenshot.

Screenshot (5)

The owner of the blog is a friend.

PLUS I contributed my behad keemti pakoray there in a post which I wonder why I didnt blog here too. And furthermore, on the blogger’s request, I designed its header but its still in the processing phase. Check it out and let me know what you think about it. Should I keep it minimal and simple or add some colors or more black designing in it at the borders? I would really appreciate it if you guys go to LIFE ABOVE ZERO and check it out!

🙂 thanks once again. I shall now reply to my readers’ comments and hope to see them back on this bloc again. Even if you all dont visit regularly, just Remember me in duas. That’s all that matters in the end.

May Allah always be your Light, my Light, Our Light! Ameen. 🙂

September 16, 2012

Her Heavenly Abode… A letter to a friend far away

by Khanum

I googled my name just like that and it brought tears to my eyes….  I had written a piece for my beloved nano years ago and submitted it to Fountain magazine in Turkey, they published it after 2 years wait in line.

“They ask me over and over again Nano, why life does everything in its power to return to death? I say hush, silent…believe and pray. Death in itself is a desire to live young, forever and ever again!”

Miss you nano..

Click here to view digital copy.

March 14, 2012

Bye Bye Uncle…take my flowers with you..

by Khanum

My Uncle from UK is flying back to his home tonight.  And another special thing today was his Lecture at NCA on Rainforest conservation and something something. It’s basically his project from Kent University. So  According to my mother last night and her strict orders that somehow have no influence on me whatsoever , ‘today’ was meant to be ‘UNCLE DAY’ all the way from dawn till dusk.

“Would you get up now or want me to take off your blanket?” I heard a woman’s urgent voice saying something in my dream. Only to my horror, it was my mother standing near my bed in real. Berra Ghark! I had missed the BREAKFAST of the month.

“what time is it?”  I mumbled , my head still pressed over pillow.

“It’s 10.”  And I promised her to get up in exactly 15 mins.

A minute passed. I cast a look on the watch and suddenly it was 12:45.  I really hate it when clocks do that. Really. It drives you crazy how fast the clock runs when you actually want some sleep.

Anyways, having no interest in going to NCA too I made an excuse to sleep some more.

“jshsdduhudxuccudcfdccdceccfd”. This was my excuse.  And such a lame excuse it was , really. Everyone could see I am just mumbling mumbo jumbo in sleep so I can sleep like a dead all day long.

Right at that moment Molvi sahib also decided to give the azaan! Great! Ab tou uthna hi tha. I got up and by the time I offered prayer all were already gone except my mother. Another Great thing. Some peace at home but then my peace was destroyed. When I had entered my uncle’s room and saw all this stuff packed up some left out and everything giving vibes of someone leaving……it felt really strange.

I really felt I had missed great breakfast today morning. I looked at mum and she was peeling carrots to make “gaajar ka halwa for him” and I felt more sad.

Sometimes we miss out small things which make others happy and matter to them. I noticed, Ever since my uncle’s been home from UK, he’s been eating the simplest things and enjoying the simplest things at home that We in general find very ordinary and don’t even enjoy. He loves the flowers. He loves the tea. He loves the food. And he could not get enough of the SUN. He used to move his chair wherever the sunlight went. I asked him oneday why do you not leave the sun alone? .  He smiled and said , In England I have everything. But Not this kind of sun. Not this kind of tea. Not this kind of sounds of the birds at the background when I am sitting with you all in the evening and having “RUSKS”.  And specifically my dear Visha, I don’t have You people.

Ah… how terribly some people abroad – miss home.

Realising all this I decided to photo shoot some things and gift him some shots by the time he’s back from NCA. I went on to take several pictures of ordinary things that he’ll miss there. Flowers in the courtyard and small things which are his memories of  the visit.

Its not like they don’t have flowers there. It’s just – He won’t find the homely flowers anywhere else in the world.

I am not going to see him off at the airport tonight. I will be the oddest one to cry my heart out If I go , I know.

See the next post for photography.

March 14, 2012

The Prophet Muhammad’s Illiteracy

by Khanum



Question: Was the Prophet illiterate throughout his life? Or did he-the one for whom veils were lifted with the verse “Read!”, and thus who could read the mysteries of the universe-ever read and write in the sense that we understand?

The Arabic word that is used to describe the Prophet’s illiteracy is “ummi.” This word is derived from “umm,” which means “mother, the middle or navel of everything, where everything or something springs up.” Ummi, thus, connects the Prophet to his mother and refers to his purest nature which remained as unsullied as on the day she gave birth to him. This word also refers to the Prophet’s connection to his birthplace, Mecca, which is described in the Qur’an as “the mother of towns (Umm al-Qura, 6:92), and to the holy shrine Ka’ba, the mother of houses (Umm al-Buyut).

The Prophet, peace be upon him, could not read the Torah or Bible or other books. God did not teach him to read or write, and this was one of the requirements for his messengership. In fact, the following verse states this: You did not (O Messenger) read of any book before it (the revelation of this Qur’an), nor did you write one with your right (or left) hand. For then, those who have ever sought to disprove the truth might have a reason to doubt (it) (29:48).

As can be understood from the verse, writing and reading were not taught to the Messenger of God. If he had known how to, those pursuing falsehood would have said, “He takes previous books, reads them, and explains to us what he read.” However, everyone-friends and foes-knew that the Prophet was illiterate. Consequently, here we see that his not being able to read and write is related to his messengership, and this fact was confirmed by his peers during his time, the Age of Happiness.

In this respect, the Prophet was not made to write. However, it is necessary to say here immediately that knowledge does not mean being able to write. The Messenger of God was given the knowledge of both former times and of the times to come. When God poured his blessings over him, the horizons lying between the East and the West cracked open, and he saw everything in front of him like the pages of a book, from an atom to the globe and from the macro-realm to the micro-realm.

God blew into his spirit the capacity “to express and read the truth” when He said, “Read!” (96:1). God said “Read” and He made His Prophet recite as he memorized the revelation all at once.

His words that he spoke in relation to every concern of life outside of the Qur’an are a separate treasury of knowledge, and this treasury is called “non-recited revelation” (wahy al-ghayri matluw). Non-recited revelation means revelation other than the Qur’an that was blown directly into the Prophet Muhammad’s spirit by God by means of Gabriel. God’s Prophet spoke throughout his life, and the distinguished Companions at his side recorded his speech. At one time some Companions thought that it was not right to record things spoken by him who as a human being could get upset at times.

Abu Hurayra describes this incident as follows: “None among the Companions of the Prophet know more hadith (the Prophet’s sayings and actions) than me; however, Abdullah b. Amr ibn al-As is an exception, for I did not write it, but he did.”

Actually, according to the statement of Abdullah b. Amr, he would write down everything he heard from God’s Messenger. Some said to him, “You write every word that comes out of the Prophet’s mouth, but he is a human also. There are times when he is angry and times when he is pleased” (Hadith narrators conceal whose words these were as a matter of courtesy and because it is not necessary.)

Due to this, Abdullah ibn Amr stopped writing and informed the Prophet about it. The Prophet raised his hand to his blessed mouth and said, “Write! I swear to God in Whose hand my life is that nothing but the truth comes out from here.”

Even if he was a human, he was still a prophet; his anger and his pleasure were for God, and he always spoke the truth in every state. Yes, none of his words were from whim, and they did not stem from human desires. More correctly, he did not speak from himself, but only what was revealed to him (see 53:3).

The Prophet’s illiteracy should not be understood to mean that he did not know anything. Even before revelation came he was a perfect and exalted spirit. He acted according to the remnants of the religion of Abraham, peace be upon him. He was known by those around him as a virtuous person. If that had not been the case, at a time when people were killing one another in Mecca, would they have turned to him as a judge?

God created him special. Then, He reflected His own knowledge to that mirror, and we witnessed the truths belonging to God in His Messenger.